The last few weeks I have shared about being addicted to your problems (“Release Yourself From Jail”) and about believing that you must have problems (“Who Would You Be Without Problems?”)
This time let me give you some more food for thought: Do you take on other people’s problems to help them out? To lessen their burden?
How does that work for you? How about for them?
Sometimes you may believe that taking on other people’s problems lessens their load or frees them to do other things. Is that really true; does it really help them? Does it help you?
Would you like to give up everyone else’s problems, troubles, and burdens now? There’s a tool that I give to people called “Return To Sender”, click here to listen to it.
Let me ask you more about being “The Fixer” in other people’s lives. Are there certain places you go to talk about your problems and the problems of others? Coffee Shops, Bars, Happy Hours, Locker rooms, Clubs? IS that where you are validating and buying into other people’s realities… Do you hear yourself saying things like:
- ”Oh, I understand!”
- “I get what you are saying!”
- “That sucks! It must make you feel so bad, terrible, and awful!”
- “I can’t believe that happened to you!”
AND then you probably defend the rightness of your situation because the problems of those people are OK and you have to measure up?
Another thing about celebrating, yes I said celebrating, other people’s problems and creating problems of your own is that you use those problems to connect to other people, to give you something in common, something to talk about! Something to mutually complain about!
How crazy is that?!?
Have you bought into the concept that the only way you can connect to others is through problems and trauma and drama?
What if you didn’t always have to have something to fix?
Something to work on?
Someone to rescue?
Do your problems distract you from truly creating something new in your life?
How much have you made your problems and issues the stability points in your life that give you something to hold on to and as long as you have those stability points, you know who you are?
Would you like to give that need for problems and free your relationships from that bondage to problems?
What if you could create your life rather than create problems and solutions?
What if you could allow yourself, others, and situations the freedom to change and to be what they will be; without judgment and control and to just be greater every day than they were the day before?
How much more are you now capable of generating and creating once you stop using so much energy to create new and better problems?
What possibilities are you capable of creating beyond your perceived problems right now?
Start with the Return To Sender tool and with these questions:
- Is this truly a problem or am I creating it for some other reason?
- If I didn’t create a problem here, what other possibilities could exist for this?
- What is the value of hanging onto my problems or other people’s problems?
- What is the value or reward for being “The Fixer” for others’ problems?
It’s a new way of living!
Give up being “The Fixer” and start creating your life for you!
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I talk about being “The Fixer” and letting it go in my book “Launchpad 2020: The Art And [Rocket] Science Of Breakthroughs And Possibilities” under Possibility Principle #3: The Fixer Upper.
The book is an adventure in Possibilities that will help you discover the art of possibilities as well as the science of it. As you journey through the Possibilities.
The Kindle and paperback versions are available on Amazon by clicking the button below:
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