Are there things in your life that you have decided MUST NOT change? Usually, it is something that you decided that you got “right”, so if you got it right you certainly don’t want to change it! Maybe it’s your job or your relationship or your house, but whatever it is, what does that do to the rest of your life?
You might believe that having a non-changeable portion of your life is not a problem, but that is actually stopping the energy in that portion of your life, so it is getting stale and it’s slowing and stopping other areas of your life too.
What Can’t You Do Now?
Here’s an example:
Let’s say that the non-changeable portion of your life is like deciding that your right arm must stay in one position for the remainder of your life.
What does that create in other areas of your life?
Well, for one thing, you can’t wear anything that requires you to raise that arm over your head. No pullover shirts or dresses, no t-shirts or tank tops; you can only wear items that you can slide over your immovable right arm and then somehow over your left arm too. Rather restrictive, right.
Also, you can’t lift or hold things that require 2 hands. That means you have to maneuver whatever item you would like to lift into a position that you can raise it with one arm and it has to be light enough that you can pick it up with just one hand. So now you are limited to small, light-weight items – no medium-sized dogs or packages, no large platters of food, and probably no children, no squirming cats or dogs.
And the list goes on.
It is the same in life. When you decide that one area of your life cannot change, that limits other areas too.
Now you can’t change anything else in your life that might impact that area that you don’t desire to change.
For instance, let’s say that you don’t want your relationship to Person A to change. Well, now you can’t make any friendships that might upset Person A, so you start limiting who you choose as friends.
You also can’t make plans or attend events that might take time away from your time with Person A, so you start limiting your activities, the parties, luncheons, dinners and so forth that you can attend, you can’t work extra or go out of town.
You can’t do activities that Person A doesn’t like because, again, that might upset Person A.
And this list goes on. And sometimes you are just making it up, believing that you limiting you will make Person A happy, when, in fact, you are not making them happy at all because you are making yourself unhappy which is probably upsetting Person A.
And then Person A leaves because you are both unhappy and Person A wants to find happiness.
Choose for Me
So, perhaps, rather than choosing a restricted life, all built around non-changeable relationships, events, and circumstances, you might consider choosing for you!
Yes, I know you probably aren’t used to even considering what might contribute to and expand your life, but you can start small.
For instance, right now, ask yourself, “If I was truly living my life for me, what would I choose to do RIGHT NOW?”
Did you get anything?
Sometimes we don’t because that muscle of “choose for me” just isn’t used much. You might need to ask a few times, and flex that muscle a little … get it used to being moved around.
Ask again, “What would I choose right now? What would I like to do right now?”
And allow the limitations and restrictions to melt away.
Move that right arm (you remember, the one you said must stay in one position forever). Move it around and see what is possible now.
Start daydreaming about something that would be fun.
And DO something that is fun!
No matter what it is.
Just do it!
Go have some fun!
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