Avoiding Gaslighting Manipulation

In the 1944 movie Gaslight, Ingrid Bergman’s husband, Charles Boyer, manipulates and emotionally and verbally abuses her to convince her that she is going insane. He, of course, has sinister motives!

This form of abuse is called Gaslighting and is an insidious form of manipulation and control. It derives its name from the 1938 play, Gas Light, upon which the film adaptation starring Ingrid Bergman was based. It can be carried out by individuals, entities, governments, abusers, dictators, narcissists, and cult leaders.

What Is Gaslighting

Victims of gaslighting are misled and forced to doubt what they know to be true, even about themselves. Victims end up doubting their memory, perception, and sanity. Over time, the gaslighter’s manipulations grow more complex and potent, making them difficult for the victim to avoid. Gaslighting can occur in personal or professional relationships. Gaslighters target their victims where it hurts: their sense of identity and self-worth. It is done slowly, so the victim doesn’t realize how much they’ve been brainwashed.

Gaslighting uses deflection, distraction, and blame by one person to hide some truth or to benefit in some way, at the cost of another. It can be anything hidden by one person that is later revealed. The reveal can lead to emotional trauma in the victim. Why? Because the victim’s brain must now continually review history and reorganize his or her experience to fit the new information. This can be extremely disorienting.

Gaslighting usually involves much lying. The longer a person lies about something, the worse the insult to the victim’s brain, and the more difficult the healing process. In the case of gaslighting, the perpetrator not only tries to cover up the truth, but also to refocus the blame on the victim as a means to escape from his or her own guilt in the situation.

A person gaslights because he knows how effective and disorienting it is. He does it because it is a powerful way to manipulate others. He does it because it takes the focus off whatever he is doing that he doesn’t want others to know about.

What Can You Do

So, what can you do?

First, congratulate yourself on being willing to question what is going on. That is the first step to regaining your life.

Second, educate yourself on the techniques used by gaslighters so you can recognize them and be less likely to get caught up in them.

Third, get people to support you. Isolation can make you more susceptible.

Hang in there.

**SPOILER ALERT** at the end of the movie Gaslight, Ingrid Bergman was able to break free.

And so can you!!

I invite you to a ZOOM called “Are You A Target Of Gaslighting” on Tuesday, July 10 at 12 PM Eastern Time (check your time here) Register by clicking here

We will be exploring more gaslighting techniques and more ways to recognize and release yourself from them.

You can watch the movie Gaslight online at https://archive.org/details/Gaslight_201403

References: Access Consciousness Foundation® manual,  https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-puzzle-love/201701/gaslighting-in-2017 , www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/here-there-and-everywhere/201701/11-warning-signs-gaslighting